Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: Abs, Baggz, Clinton, Interview, Sleep
Being in bed working on a presentation while hopped up on flu meds, it’s tough really concentrating for long spans of time. Did I mention that “What not to Wear” is on in the background? Well, it is. So again, my mind tends to wander. I’ve made an interview to entertain myself, and you as well, dear reader! I hope you enjoy the following dialogue.
LEGEND: JM= Jana Mason
JM: Jana, there was a time in your life last year during which you volunteered at the cat shelter in Wolfville. Tell me about that.
JM: There was a cat whose name I can’t quite recall who was brought into the veterinary side of the building; we called him “Tutti” because he reminded us of a mob boss. He was pushing 23 pounds. He was too big for his cat bed, and his fat spilled over quite noticeably. You would have thought he would be embarrassed by this, but it was obvious that he couldn’t be bothered to care. Oh, that guy.
JM: Jana, which of the cats did you like the most?
JM: I loved them all equally, of course.
JM: Jana, if the shelter was to catch on fire, and you lost one of your arms in the flames somehow, so you could only grab one cat, which one would you save first?
JM: I guess Floyd. Floyd was a player, so he’d find a way to make up for the lost population of kittens lost in the fire.
JM: Jana, if you died and were hidden in the backroom of the shelter and went unnoticed for a week somehow (Oh, and the cats were left wandering without supervision for a reasonable amount of time), do you think they’d eat you. If yes, which parts would they eat?
JM: You’re making me sound like a crazy cat lady, Jana!
JM: Jana, if you and Floyd were on a tour of an art museum, and you were looking at your favourite painting by your favourite artist in all of history, and the museum caught on fire and burned off your other arm, and you had to save either the painting or your cat by carrying it in your mouth, which would you choose? The painting or the cat?
JM: If I carried Floyd in my mouth, could he in turn carry the painting in his mouth?
JM: Jana, if you were an armless woman living alone with one cat and no art, would you resent the cat?
JM: Floyd would have provided me with kittens, and so I’d have trained them from a young age to act as my arms. It’d be like I was part animal. Which is awesome, so, no.
JM: Jana, if you were a one-armed cat in an apartment with a dead woman, which part of her would you eat first?
So, about the title of this entry:
To be fair, it could be the nighttime medicine I’ve just taken -DURING THE DAY!- that’s making me want to finish up my nap I had started this morning. Almost directly after waking up.
